Sunday, July 31, 2011

Sídhí Beginnings

The home world of Sídhí

One quick bit of news before I attempt to become a storyteller of grand proportions. LOL

As you know, Raphael (mega-singer songwriter) Thumped me the other day announcing that he found his lifeMate. Well, I have it on good authority that Raphael doesn't know who the lucky girl is! She hasn't come forward and he doesn't want to announce that she hasn't. Can you imagine the reaction of millions of die-hard fans from every valley around the world? He'd be swarmed with women swearing their synth crystal sang for him, naming him their lifeMate.

The second bit of news is a bit more disturbing. Reports from London, France (Earth) and San Francisco, California (Earth) indicate Elf Hunts are on the rise. Historically, hunts targeted mundanes and vampires, capturing mundanes for slaves and killing the vampires.

The majority of elf ruled valleys outlawed Elf Hunts years ago, no doubt due to vampire's retaliation methods. Vampires hunted down Elf Hunters then killed them and all of the hunter's blood kin, a very effective warning.

I'll keep you updated on the Elf Hunts.

On to the requested history lesson, hopefully it won't bore you to tears. Please, let me know if it does.

Why are Sídhí different from mundanes? Why do they have seven senses and not five? Why do they heal rapidly and stay eternally young?

Well, I hope to answer your questions over a series of brief articles.

Tens of thousands of years ago, there was a highly advanced civilization on a world named Sídhí. Technology so advanced modern scientist would either scratch their heads or call them higher beings. Unfortunately, highly advanced did not mean smarter.

Like Earth, Sídhí had a fixed amount of natural resources. In their arrogance, they ignored the warning signs as they drilled deeper for oil, carved huge swaths out of the soil searching for coal, air became thick and putrid, and unfiltered water undrinkable.

Scientists screamed warnings, but no one listened until it was too late.

Governments rationed fossil fuels. As people became desperate for fuel to heat their homes entire forests were cut down in a handful of years.

War broke out between the nations, each blaming the other. War hastened the inevitable. Every drop, every crumb of natural fuel/gem/metal was cut from the world. All that remained above ground was rapidly used up or in storage facilities.

A scientist, whose real name has been long forgotten, proposed a plan. He believed energy could be created with no waste by-product unlike nuclear energy. He argued pure energy should expand exponentially (grow by itself) and not expend energy unless triggered.

It sounded like a hair-brained theory, but it was their best hope. Each nation agreed upon a cease-fire.

Scientists from around the world came together. They started-out using the original scientist's research. Safety precautions grew lax as they became desperate.

After a time, they created a substance they nicknamed, synth crystal. To say synth crystal was unique implied simplicity; it was such a feeble description for the most powerful energy ever created. At least the scientists all believed it was power beyond anyone's wildest dreams.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Atlantis Report on Kraken Nets Threat!

Broken Arrow, Oklahoma: Earth

Well! The very small news clip I wrote about the theft of kraken eggs from Atlantis Valley brought me a little bit of unwanted attention.

The Khr'Vurr, a terrorist organization based in Dragon Valley, sent me a present. Yes, I know, Guardian Alexander did warn me not to agitate them. (See news reports July 18 & 19)

This morning I opened my front door and found a dead skrivett - a nasty soccer ball sized rodent covered in leaky pus that smelled like warmed-up sewer - hanging ten feet above the ground in an old oak tree. The Khr'Vurr hung it with an Old Western type noose and wrapped my favorite blue scarf around its hind leg.

The nerve! What were they thinking! I live on Earth. Hello? What if a mundane had seen their little gift?

Honestly, I still don't know how they managed to sneak into my house and steal my scarf. I can't believe Chief, my three-year-old German Shepherd, didn't go nuts. He barks when the crape myrtle brushes the window.

I'll never look at scarves the same way again.

Let me tell you what they wrote on the note.

They didn't give me a dire threat like, “Stay out of our business or we'll kill you.” No, I think I hit a nerve with yesterday's news clip. The note said, “Only a certified idiot would stick her nose where it wasn't wanted. Your Loving Readers, The Khr'Vurr."

Well, I have no doubt in my mind that note proves the Khr'Vurr stole those kraken eggs. I called Guardian Alexander to tell him my theory. Do you know what his response was?

He hung up on me!

Moronic idiots, I'm surrounded by them!

On to a happy note, I received a request from a reader! I'm so excited! In the letter, Miss Clara Burnstien longtime resident of Stigler, Oklahoma (Earth) and a Land Fairy pointed out that many of my readers are mundane. Of course, I already knew this, but she went on to say my readers might want to hear about Sídhí's history. Well, not simply history, but how the dozens of Sídhí races came into being.

She said, "…the few mundanes the Council allows to know about Sídhí are sure to be curious about our origins. And while you're telling them about the Ancient Ones and how they nearly destroyed us be sure to tell them a few of our beloved stories."

I wasn't quite sure what she meant by 'beloved stories' and I wasn't going to ask. The woman talks faster than a speeding bullet. I got in about three words during our hour long phone call."

I think she meant mundanes would like to hear small stories about special people sprinkled through Sídhí history. Yeah, like I'm an expert on Sídhí history. Whatever, I'll do my best.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Friday, July 29, 2011

Phoenix Attacks Hikers

Initial reports from DaKine Valley were not alarming. They issued a brief news alert reminding hikers within the DaKine National Preserve not to disturb nesting phoenix.

After a few phone calls, I found out a pair of phoenix are terrorizing hikers.

The highly popular tourist destination, known worldwide for its exotic wildlife, is located in the Pacific Ocean with a dimensional footprint that overlays Hawaii and a large portion of the Pacific Ocean.

The volcanoes dotting the DaKine Valley are the preferred hunting and mating grounds for many Sídhí breeds including phoenix, lava sprite, and salamander.

It's unknown why the pair of phoenix has been attacking hikers. Both birds appear well fed and they do not have fledglings. After each incident, the hikers swear they did not antagonize the birds.

To date, the fire dripping birds have attacked thirty-two people. I found it rather odd all of the victims have been elves. I mentioned this to Hillary Hursliegh, administrative assistant to the tourism chair, Lord Samuel Pinkle. Both are dragons.

Hillary bluntly told me I was grasping at straws, trying to in-flame a boring story into a serious incident.

Of course, I'm sure the seventeen elves that received third-degree burns might take offense to the attacks being considered anything less than serious.

Hubert Pinkle, no relation to Lord Samuel, captured a recent attack on video. It showed the female phoenix dive-bombing several elves, splashing them with flames as it dripped off her feathers. While the female held the elves attention, the male landed on each tent and shook, throwing drips of flame onto the material.

Lord Samuel and The DaKine Tourist Association down played the video, attempting to blame the elves for entering the phoenix's nesting area. The elves insist they didn't go near the restricted area.

In fact, one of the elves heard a high-pitched dog whistle several minutes before the initial attack.

After hearing the elves' side of the story, I contacted Hubert and asked for a copy of the video, which he sent to me. On the video, I found the brief image of a man near the lip of the volcano crater waving at the birds. Zooming in, the man had a whistle to his mouth and was none other than Lord Samuel Pinkle.

I turned my information over to the DaKine Guardians.

As of five o'clock this evening, Lord Samuel is under house arrest.

In other news, Atlantis Valley reported the theft of six kraken eggs.

I shudder to think how the fairies will react. Trust me I would NOT want to be in the thief's shoes. No one messes with the fairies of Atlantis.

Get real, even a certified idiot knows that!

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Phoenix - A phoenix is a bird of prey with brilliant red feathers. Adults have an average wingspan of twelve feet and a body mass of ten pounds. Fish and small animals make up the majority of their diet. Even with a hooked beak and razor sharp talons, it isn't the scariest looking bird around. They are beautiful whether standing or flying. Standing they have sparks of fire that flicker around the red feathers. In flight, the pretty sparks turn into a weapon, building into slender fingers of flame as they feed on the rush of oxygen. Once the flames reach two or three inches in length, normally after a few minutes of flight, the birds dive at larger prey. They are very intelligent and are popular attractions at zoos and circuses.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

UFO Sighting!

Wednesday night at 10:03 p.m., UFO buffs and hundreds of residents as far south as Las Vegas, Nevada reported an Unidentified Flying Object zipping over restricted airspace known as Area 51. The UFO disappeared five miles north of Las Vegas.

Thursday morning at 12:15 a.m., the same thing happened above Roswell, New Mexico.

At 1:47 a.m., residents and tourists reported seeing a UFO above Table Rock Lake and Branson, Missouri.

At 2:43 a.m., residents around The Great Lakes reported seeing a UFO dipping into the water and surging out again. The odd behavior continued for over an hour.

At 3:57 a.m., Dragon Guardians caught up with Reginald of Clan Darby, putting a stop to his aerial show in the mundane world.

Reginald, a dragon shapeshifter, is a firm supporter of 'coming out of the closet.'

Every year, for the last four hundred and nineteen years, he has petitioned The Dragon Council to announce the presence of Sídhí to the residents of Earth.

At first, he paid respectful visits to each of the council members. Now, he performs illegal fly-bys on Earth.

I know what you're thinking. Why hasn't a satellite captured his picture? Simple, Reginald is from Clan Darby.

Each dragon clan has certain abilities. Where the DeLeigh Clan can see people's auras, the Darby Clan is a twisted version of a chameleon. When a Darby shapeshifter changes into their dragon form, they reflect the aspect of whatever gem that is touching their body.

Normally, a Darby wears a horn cuff or thick bracelet encrusted in the gem of their choice. Once shifted, their scales look like gems.

Reginald prefers wearing opals, which accounts for the shimmer in most UFO photographs.

To further muddy the picture, the older dragons within the Darby clan, have the uncanny ability to blur their appearance. To date, every known picture or video of Reginald looks like a big white/silver blob racing and dipping through the sky.

Several different mundane countries captured him on video chasing fighter jets.

I asked Reginald for a statement.

His response fit the worn denim jeans and t-shirt he sported. "If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times we must announce our presence to the mundanes. In this day and age, with cameras attached to every spare surface someone is going to get caught doing an 'impossible' human task. I agree with helping the mundanes, but I shudder every time one of us lifts a car off a child or catches a baby falling from a fifteen-story drop. One day soon we'll get ratted out. What happens if a camera catches an exile feeding?"

Good question. What would happen if a mundane camera caught an exile (or dhark) vampire feeding? Thanks to Hollywood and some best-selling novels, vampires are all golden and perfect. That unrealistic picture could change in the blink of an eye.

Just image the horror most mundanes would feel if they saw a vampire sucking blood from a living donor. It would not be the best introduction.

Perhaps Reginald is correct, maybe Sídhí need to come out of the closet.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Vampire in Dallas!

Dallas - Fort Worth Metro, Texas: Earth

A multi-car pileup in the Dallas - Fort Worth Metro (on Earth) resulted in numerous injuries and four fatalities.

Morgan Stantleberry, vampire, has lived in Texas for his entire life. He turned twenty-one in May. He's a die-hard Dallas Cowboy fan and works as a car sales man.

He might want to reconsider his career choice.

Earlier today, he rode with Matt DeLittle, a mundane who took a test drive. Against Morgan's suggestion, Matt took the little sports car up on one of the numerous expressways crisscrossing the area.

The actual pile-up was not Matt's fault, but since he was going nearly ninety miles an hour he couldn't stop in time. He hit the bed of a flatbed truck and went air born, flipping several times before landing in the opposite lane of traffic. A semi-truck hit the little sports car, completely crushing it. Unable to stop, the truck pushed it another hundred yards before stopping.

The accident killed Matt instantly.

Emergency personnel found Morgan unconscious and rushed him to the hospital.

Morgan, a Clan vampire, doesn't drink blood, except in a recreational sense. But after all is said and done, he is still a vampire.

When seriously injured a vampire's first reaction is to drink blood as it helps speed up the healing process. I'm sure you can see where I'm heading with this.

Morgan woke-up in the emergency room quite delirious. The young nurse drawing his blood never knew what hit her. He grabbed her wrist and chomped down. Yeah, that went over like a ton of bricks.

The nurse shrieked loud enough I'm surprised I didn't hear her all the way in Oklahoma.

A second nurse tried pulling Morgan off the first nurse. - Good luck detaching a blood hungry vampire! - When she couldn't budge him, she bashed him on the head with a bedpan. It went downhill from there.

Morgan raised his head, with his fangs still extended and hissed at the second nurse. Security stormed in the curtained room about the same time.

Morgan came to his senses soon enough, but not before people began screaming vampire. Security shot him twice.

He was too dazed to do more than mentally call for help.

His parents arrived and mentally froze everyone. They called in several friends, but soon realized they needed a lot more help.

Clan Guardians swarmed the hospital, mentally wiping the episode from every mundane mind. In this day and age, they also had to confiscate the security video and dozens of phones. Tracking down who sent images and to whom, took an entire squadron of guardians less than an hour to accomplish.

Since Morgan was so young a healer was brought in to speed-up Morgan's natural healing ability. With the extra blood and a healer's touch, Morgan walked out of the hospital on his own two feet.

The disaster ended on a happy note. Morgan found his lifeMate. She happened to be the mundane nurse he bit. Thankfully, she wasn't seriously injured.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Raphael Thumped me today!

For my mundane followers, Thumper is the Sídhí equivalent of Twitter.

Raphael has over fifteen million followers on Thumper and he follows less than five hundred. His music tours have been known to cause riots when sold out and people couldn't buy a ticket.

Yes, that Raphael! Guess what? He followed me!

Squee!!!! To say I'm excited is the understatement of the year! To have someone like Raphael follow me on Thumper is unbelievable!

Last year alone, Raphael won fourteen Crystal Awards for his awesome singing and song writing ability. The trophy for the award is rumored to cost one million dollars each. (Clan Valley uses the same type of monetary system as the U.S. It keeps down confusion since Clan Valley's second dimensional footprint sits over part of the U.S.)

The trophy is five intertwined ribbons of synth crystal and stands eight inches high. Master Artist Theodus Grimson, a two-thousand year old Vas Fairy in the artist caste, creates each trophy. Need I say the Crystal Award is the most coveted of all music awards?

Now, can you understand why I'm so excited? At only nineteen, he was named one of the top ten bachelors in all the valleys combined.

Even if he didn't have the most incredible set of lungs on him, his 'oh so perfect' face would have sky rocketed him into instant stardom. Three inches over six feet, he towers over his band. Jet-black hair down to his shoulder blades and slate gray eyes that have electric blue sparks in them when he sings.

His eyes alone announce his fairy genetics. As a siren, he is a member of the warrior caste. A siren's ability, or their voice, is rated on a scale from one to ten with a special designation stating the 'type' of voice. Anything from mind shattering screams to enthralling song can come from various sirens. I've heard Raphael rates a ten and his designation is unknown.

His PR representative, Kayla, refuses to confirm or deny the rumor.

Sorry, I'm rambling but I'm still shaking.

His Thump to me said: Jodie, I've found my lifeMate! I'm over joyed!! Please help me spread the word. So here, I am spreading the word and a bit more.

I know he must be thrilled. Every Sídhí, no matter the race, only have a single lifeMate. They might wait thousands of years before finding their perfect mate, but it's worth the wait. Trust me a Sídhí couple who are bonded lifeMates will be a perfect union.

The synth crystal swimming in the blood of a Sídhí always places two compatible people together. It's part of their genetic make-up. Immortals are not complete without a bonded lifeMate. It’s why the synth finds the perfect mate for them.

When the crystal in a person’s blood sings for a person's lifeMate, it is literally love-at-first-sight. I've never heard of a lifeMate not instantly falling in love. Most lifeMates mentally bond as soon as their crystal sings.

A lifeBond between two mates allows them to feel the others emotions. Can you imagine knowing exactly how much someone loves you? It would be the most awesome feeling in the world.

There is a downside to finding a lifeMate. Not all lifeMates hear the synth in their blood sing at the same time. It must be agony knowing who your lifeMate is only to have them look at you as if you’re a complete stranger.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Monday, July 25, 2011

Angel Sighting in Celtic Valley

Inverness, Scotland: Celtic Valley

Meredith McNeil reported seeing an angel early Sunday morning. The event happened northwest of Inverness, Scotland in Celtic Valley, near Loch Glass.

Meredith didn't file an official report with Celtic guardians, complaining they didn't believe her the previous times. Yes, supposedly she has seen four angels in the last ten years, which must have set some kind of record.

The latest report split the small village, on the edge of Loch Glass, straight down the middle. The Faithful, as they call themselves, believe Meredith can see God's messengers. They believe she is touched. People drive hours, simply seeking her opinion.

On the opposite side of the argument stand the Disbelievers, a label given by the Faithful. They say Meredith, who happens to be a vampire, has become unhinged. It's always a possibility. She is after all over nine hundred years old and hasn't found her lifeMate.

The Disbelievers insist Meredith is nutty as a fruit bat high on nectar.

Now, hearing that phrase come out of a mouth with a thick Scottish burr kept me asking Martin Black to repeat himself, which he did. Bless him.

Martin, a dragon and Celtic Guardian, calls Loch Glass his home. He was kind enough to speak with me, at great length.

Meredith refused, quite loudly and rudely, to speak with me. I might add she sounded tipsy.

Martin actually has several interesting theories. First, he thinks Meredith is smoking too much wacky weed. However, he's never smelled it on her. His next theory is she might be seeing sunrays reflecting between the clouds and the loch.

I asked him, if he thought she might be trying to boost the local economy, as she owns the largest bed and breakfast in the village.

He didn't disagree with me, but his next words made the reporter in me sit up and listen.

Yes, you heard me correctly; I promptly forgot my theory of greed as he told me his third theory.

Martin thinks she might be seeing fairy.

The majority of fairies live within Atlantis Valley and they don't have wings. Well, most of them don't, but the highest of the warrior caste have wings. Warrior fairies are completely unpredictable, even among fairies they're given a wide berth.

Fairies are unusual among the Sídhí as they have a caste system. Essentially the fairy race is made up of dozens of sub-races. Each sub-race is contained within one of five castes: royal, warrior, merchant, artist, and common. As an example, a banshee is a mid-level warrior caste.

One sub-race within the top caste of the warrior fairies is the exception to the no-wings rule. From the pictures I've seen and the stories, I've heard they are perfect in every way.

Every one of them, male or female is drop dead gorgeous. Their wings aren't pure white. The single picture that sticks prominently in my mind is the oil painting, Wings by Maurice Swift. The background is a brilliant sunset over the ocean. The artist captured the man's shoulder muscles tightening as he flared his wings wide. Gorgeous golden skinned with wings the color of a late evening storm, dark gray with blue and silver etching.

The painting took my breath away the first time I laid eyes on it at the Royal Museum in Alberta, Canada in Elfhiem Valley.

Unfortunately, the near mythical race of warrior fairy has not been seen since Sídhí arrived on Earth some four thousand years ago.

History is a bit blurry on the subject of what happened to the highest of the fairy warrior caste.

I called the fairy's embassy in Celtic Valley, but I wasn't surprised when they refused to discuss the subject with me. The few fairies I've met are extremely rude to other races.

Until next time - Jodie B. Cooper

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Stolen Sasquatch Recovered! part II


Norman, the Sasquatch aka Big Foot, has been captured near the small town of Stigler, Oklahoma (in the mundane world.)

Master Healer Margaret Mai Lynn officially reported no serious injuries, stating she stabilized a broken leg. I found out later, she broke Sídhí law by completely healing a ruptured artery in the mundane rancher when he tried calling for help. If she hadn't healed him, he would've died.

For all you mundanes out there, be very wary of healers. Never, not unless you are seconds from dying, ask a healer to help you. Trust me you'll probably end up dead. When it comes to a mundane, a healer is more dangerous than a dhark vampire.

You see, healers can heal Sídhí.

Vampire, dragon, shapeshifter, it doesn't matter which Sídhí race as long as a person has synth crystal in their blood a healer can pull energy from herself and the injured person. This allows the healer enough energy to heal a Sídhí, even if the Sídhí is near death.

Unfortunately, when a healer attempts to heal a mundane the person's very life essence is sucked out. Sucking a person's essence is very addictive. That's why most valleys have banned healers from visiting Earth, a ruthless practice, but effective.

On a happy note, the mundane rancher is alive. He fell into a coma due to his life's essence nearly getting sucked dry, but Healer Margaret swears he'll wake-up in a month or two.

Oh dear! I've gone off on one of my tangents, haven't I? On to the events of Friday night, which lead to Norman's capture!

I parked my ancient Chevy truck next to the brick ranch house in the nick of time.

Clan Guardian Alexander stood on the porch, berating Healer Serena for nearly killing Mark. Several Clan Guardians noticed me and waved, but I steered clear of Alexander. He would've stopped me from interviewing the victims.

I found Mark's wife and three teenage girls sitting in the living room. Each of them stared blankly at the ceiling, mouths dropped open.

I feared the guardians had already wiped the true memories from their minds and mentally ordered them to remain silent. Thankfully, that didn't happen.

Guardian Tremaine, a really sweet vampire with dark auburn hair and a gorgeous – repeat all rippling muscles, no fat – body, allowed me to interview the women.

The youngest daughter, Sheila, provided the best recount of the evening. The mother wouldn't quit sobbing and the other two girls couldn't take their eyes off Tremaine to answer my questions.

Anyway, Sheila said they heard a horrible noise about ten o'clock.

Mark grabbed his gun, ordering his wife to lock the door behind him. He opened the front door. Shouted (Sheila said, he sounded scared) and rapidly fired his gun. Slammed the door shut. All the while, shouting for everyone to run to the cellar. That's what they call storm shelters.

They ran through the house toward the kitchen. Sheila heard the front door, a solid oak monstrosity, being ripped off its hinges.

Attached to the house, the storm shelter opened into the laundry room. They piled in the cement room and bolted the steel door shut.

Mark was a smart man. Well, mostly. On their dash through the kitchen, he kicked the trash can over, spilling its contents. They had spent the night before cutting and packing a deer he shot. Yes, he killed it out of season, but that's beside the point.

The blood kept the Sasquatch occupied.

If Mark had stayed in the storm shelter, everything would've worked out fine. He didn't. He left to call for help and the Sasquatch chased him up a tree.

Unfortunately, all Sasquatch have very long claws and are very good tree climbers.

Norman slashed Mark's thigh, puncturing a major artery.

Clan guardians showed up before Norman pulled Mark out of the tree, shooting Norman with a tranquilizer dart.

Norman is now peacefully sleeping off the tranq dart. For those of you who wish to meet Norman, his new home is a twenty acre enclosure at Mordecai's Sasquatch Ranch.

Mordecai's has daily tours. I encourage families or individuals who want a longer adventure to purchase one of their many tour packages, which (depending on the package you pick) include a cabin, jet skis, trail rides, and a dozen other wonderful extras. Tell them Jodie sent you!

On a final note, Clan guardians gave the mundane family and Haskell County emergency workers vague memories of a rabid black bear, not a very good cover story but it worked.

Until next time ~ Jodie B. Cooper

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Stolen Sasquatch Recovered!

Stigler, Oklahoma: Earth

Miss Clara Burnstien, who has lived in the mundane world for the last one hundred and twenty-three years, faithfully listens to the local police scanner. Last night, at 11:15, an unusual report sent Haskell County deputies to Mark Hawk's ranch.

Clan guardians confiscated the recorded message from Haskell County, but I managed to get a copy.

Operator: Haskell County...

Mark: You've got to help us!

Operator: Is this an emergency?

Mark: Yes! A monster broke into the house!

Operator: Please, stay calm. Is the assailant still there?

Mark: It's not a person!

:A high shrieking scream with dual tones erupts in the background:

Operator: Oh my God! What was that?

Mark: The monster! Big Foot!


Mark: We need help! I shot the damn thing with a 9mm. I hit it three times and didn't kill it!

Operator: Tying up this phone line with a half-cocked prank...

Mark: Hell and damnation! My family is gonna die cause you won't get off your high horse and send me help! You want a good enough reason to send a deputy? Fine! I'm gonna kill my wife and three kids!

Operator: You're nuts! I'll send a car and I'll testify at your trial, you crazy S.O.B.

:Phone slams down:

Well, that was interesting. I can't say I blame the poor operator, Mark did sound deranged.

…continued until tomorrow.

Jodie B. Cooper

Friday, July 22, 2011

Accident at Wyvern Riding Academy

Great Falls, Montana: Khärston Valley

Wyvern Riding Academy, south of Great Falls, Montana in the Khärston Valley, reported a near fatal accident this morning.

For the Mundanes among us, wyvern are often confused with dragons. Dragons being a sentient race of people with the ability to change their form into that of a dragon. On the other hand, a wyvern is an animal approximately the size of a quarter horse with a twenty foot wing span. Most wyvern have been domesticated and are frequently used for sports and pleasure riding.

Several valleys have a contingent of search and rescue wyvern, comparable to a search and rescue dog used in natural disasters. Of course, there are several differences between the rescue animals. Wyvern conduct searches from the sky by sight and the trainer must be nearby as the wyvern frequently tries to eat the victim.


A group of third year academy students were playing Sky War, which involves fairy enhanced laser guns and paint, when someone shot one of the wyvern in the eye. The enhanced paint is equivalent to colorful slime and sticks to anything.

It's not clear who fired the original shot, but the damage was done. Red paint blinded the mount.

The dark brown female w/ black belly splotches swerved wildly and its wing smacked the tail of another wyvern, a rare blue with cream wing tips. Everyone knows how sensitive the snake-like tail of a wyvern is. Well, let me tell you, old blue let out a bellow. People heard him five miles away.

The blue went rogue, attacking anything that moved.

By the end of the Sky War, five wyvern sustained serious injures. Four students – who should have been wearing safety harnesses – fell from the sky.

School officials rushed healers to the downed riders. The students, two of whom were pre-pubs, nearly died from their injuries. I've been assured the healers arrived in time and none of the students sustained permanent damage.

The investigation is pending, but at this time there doesn't appear to be any malicious intent on any one's part.

Until next time ~ Jodie B. Cooper

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Warning! Big Foot on the Loose in Oklahoma

Southeast Oklahoma, Earth

An all points warning has been issued to all Sídhí living in or near the Southeastern corner of Oklahoma. A Sasquatch, or Big Foot as they are called down South, is on the loose in the Mundane world.

If you see the creature, don't try and capture it. Call the Clan Guardians.

The nine foot animal is the same one stolen from Mordecai's Sasquatch Ranch a few days ago. Norman, the Sasquatch, is high dollar animal prized for his thick, dark brown fur and mild temperament. Well, mild for a Sasquatch. He's never ripped an arm or leg off any of his keepers. His stud fee is nearly seven thousand dollars.

I'm sure you're wondering how such an expensive animal was stolen.

Well, a couple of vampire teenagers stole the animal as a prank or so they insisted after they got caught. They said, there hadn't been a reliable Big Foot sighting on Earth in several years and wanted to correct the oversight.

I asked the teenagers if they thought they'd get caught.

Harvey Knix and Timmy Parnicus insisted they thought it would be a lot of fun to release a Sasquatch onto Earth, not thinking anyone would be hurt.

Effectively, not answering my question!

Honestly, I don't know why they did it, but they might rethink their next prank as they have been sentenced to wearing a silver collar for a three year term. If you ask me, it's a very mild sentence. I mean who knows what kind damage such a huge brute w/ four inch claws and a mouth full of thumb sized fangs will cause on Earth?

For those of my readers who aren't familiar with Sídhí genetics, wearing silver is a horrible punishment as it restricts a Sídhí's seven senses (Sídhí have seven senses, not five) and other gifts. As vampires, Harvey & Timmy will not be able to teleport or extend their claws until the collar is removed.

The collar is fairy made, which allows the nineteen year-old pranksters to pick a single sense that will not be impaired. Surprisingly, they both retained their ability to extend their fangs.

I say surprising as Clan vampires eat real food, they aren't bloodsuckers. Well, except for recreational purposes.

Of course, the type of recreational blood drinking a teenager would be involved in might answer why they wanted to keep their ability to suck blood. LOL

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Gnomes & Stink Bombs

Clan Valley

Warning! If you have a weak stomach stop reading right now.

Clan Valley High School has canceled summer school.

I know, it sounds insane. Right? Half the summer semester is already over with so canceling summer school seemed very odd to me. I called around and found out the true reason.

With the influx of gnomes into Clan Valley the school board insisted all gnomes under the age of eighteen must attend school. For those of you who don't know, Clan Valley is primarily a vampire valley. The transition has not been easy for gnomes or vampires.

Well, the gnomes – generally speaking they are three-feet tall with wrinkly skin like a Shar Pei and have brilliant red fuzzy hair that's about an inch long – refused to comply with the mandate.

Everyone knows gnomes are notorious pranksters so their response shouldn't have surprised anyone.

Gnomes taped the official mandate to the school doors, marked 'no' across the paper in bold red ink, and then flushed a fairy made stink bomb down every commode on school property.

Mundanes have no clue how bad a fairy made stink bomb smells.

Honestly, fairies – especially those from the artist caste – can create just about anything by utilizing their talent to manipulate synth energy, including changing normal attributes of certain objects. Today, the object in question was super glue. What they did was 'scientifically' impossible, but you must remember we are talking about fairies. They tend to warp scientific theory out of shape until it's unrecognizable.

The stink bombs were comprised of super glue, cow manure, rabbit manure, and skrivett pus. (A skrivett is a pus covered rodent.) The compressed bomb went down the pipes and exploded, spreading chunks of manure through-out the entire sewage system. No, it did not dissolve.

When the synth enhanced super glue touched the interior plastic wall of the pipes, it activated and expanded, sticking cow manure and pebble sized rabbit pellets throughout the entire sewer system. The skrivett pus, which smells like raw sewage in its natural state went everywhere, including the ceiling of the bathrooms.

I'm sure you can imagine, Principle Tinklebunn blew a gasket.

Literally, she shrieked until all the windows in the entire school and surrounding community shattered. Need I mention she is a fairy of the warrior caste? To be very specific she is a siren.

Even with so much damage, with the proper fairy made solvent, it shouldn't take the remainder of the summer to clean up the mess.

Well, you wouldn't think so, but the only one who can create a counter chemical to destroy the super glue is Samuel Nippers, the fairy who created the stink bombs. He is a Master Class within his caste and has refused to create a solvent that would disolve the super glue.

I've heard it without the solvent it will take weeks to dislodge the crap from the sewer system, clean the skrivett pus off the walls, and replace all of the windows.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Sasquatch Theft & Dragon Guardian Interview

Clan Valley guardians are investigating the disappearance of a sasquatch (aka Big Foot) from Mordecai's Sasquatch Ranch on the western edge of Lake Eufaula in the Eastern part of Oklahoma.

Clan guardians believe there is foul play involved, but the owner of the ranch is not a subject in the ongoing investigation. The animal arrived the same day it disappeared and hadn't been paid for. Mordecai Bunn said his insurance wouldn't cover the disappearance of the animal.

As a side note, I wanted to mention I've visited the ranch, which has cabins and jet skis for rent. The ranch is a fun family destination. It's also world famous for it sasquatch breeding program, which provides zoos and big game hunters with quality Sasquatch.

Onward to the promised interview with a Dragon Guardian!

I transcribed the promised conversation I had with dragon guardian Alexander concerning the terrorist organization Khr'Vurr, which is based in Dragon Valley.

I'll skip the pleasantries and get to the good stuff...

Jodie: Is it true the Khr'Vurr, a notoriously 'dragon only' organization is actively recruiting outside of Dragon Valley?

Alexander: No comment.

Jodie: You're a guardian. It's your duty to protect. So shouldn't you be willing to warn people? What if they start terrorizing the other valleys? People need information.

Alexander: Jodie, this isn't a game. You need to keep your nose out of it.

Jodie: Yes, I know it isn't a game. That's my point! Wouldn't it be better to warn people?

Alexander: :sighs: We believe the Khr'Vurr is actively seeking new recruits.

Jodie: Are they targeting any specific valley? You know like only valleys in the Dhark Empire?

Alexander: Off the record?

Jodie: Yes, of course! (he knew I'd tell... I always do.)

Alexander: The Khr'Vurr have united with several Dhark Valley Lords, extending their network into a dozen different valleys. This is a very dangerous time for Sídhí and Mundanes. We're concerned the silent war they've started may soon explode into something a lot worse.

Jodie: You mean like the bomb exploding in the Royal Valley? I've heard it was targeting Prince Jacoby, because he refused to cooperate with the Khr'Vurr.

:pause:  Then he hissed at me!

Alexander: Who told you that?

Jodie: Anonymous tip. I've been going through records. Did you know in the last three months car bombs and kidnappings have increased by four hundred percent?

:low, deep growl:  Dragons, even when they are in human form, growl really well. He made the hair stand up on my head.

Jodie: And I've heard the Dragon Council is so desperate to find the Khr'Vurr ring leaders they have threatened other valleys.


Jodie: Well, is it true? Can Dragon Council shut down all the gateways leading to Earth? Will they?

Alexander: Jodie, you get one warning. This is it. Stay out of Khr'Vurr business. And more importantly stay out of council business. Do not go spreading false rumors.

Jodie: Now, wait a minute...

Alexander: No, you're sticking your nose into things that's going to get you killed. The Khr'Vurr are big league. Stay. Out. Of. It.

Jodie: I'm a reporter. It's my duty...

:he cuts me off, the nerve!:

Alexander: No, you're a nosy busy body.

:Slams phone down in my ear:

Well! That was rude!

Honestly, anyone who knows me understands my need for searching out the true story. No matter the danger to my own well being. Of course, someone like Alexander calls it nosy behavior, but I think everyone understands my need to give them the true story.

Never worry, I'll keep digging!

Monday, July 18, 2011

Khr'Vurr (dragon terrorists) Increasing Recruiting Efforts

Dragon Valley

This morning I received an anonymous tip on The Khr’Vurr (pronounced Car Vur as in fur, but with a v.) Let me tell you, that phone call woke me up faster than a hot cup of java.

For anyone that doesn't know, the Khr'Vurr is a terrorist organization based in Dragon Valley. Oh, they don't call themselves terrorists. They actually call themselves freedom fighters. :Snorts loudly: Like anyone believes that drivel.

Anyway, I've been informed the Khr'Vurr are increasing their recruiting efforts. At first, I was quite put out my anonymous tipster called and woke me up at three in the morning, but I quickly got over my snit when they told me the Khr'Vurr are expanding beyond Dragon Valley.

OMG! This is horrible news! Honestly, I've never been so shocked. The Khr'Vurr have been around hundreds of years. Some say they originated on the Sídhí home world some four thousand years ago. So, I'm sure you will be as shocked as I am that they are recruiting in non-dragon Valleys.

That's right, you heard it here first! The – dragon only – Khr'Vurr are expanding their organization to accept non-dragon recruits.

This is the same organization that kidnapped, tortured, & killed Junior Dragon Councilwoman Lynda McKee. Then they had the sick audacity to post a clip of the torture on V-tube (that's the vampire equivalent of U-tube.)

I called one of my contacts in Dragon Valley, a totally hot guy who shifts into a bus sized dragon. Nearly seven feet tall, Guardian Alexander of the DeLeigh Clan is in charge of the dragon unit currently investigating the Khr'Vurr.

I recorded the conversation (with his permission of course – wink, wink.) When I get the conversation transcribed I'll post it here on Sídhí World News!

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Escaped Werewolves Captured

Clan Valley: Fayetteville, Arkansas

The pair of werewolves, which escaped from Hitchcock Zoo (Eureka Springs, AR) last week were recaptured today. After a merry chase following a trail of dead livestock it ended this morning when the werewolves (Janie Lee & Herbert) broke into a chicken barn in Fayetteville, Arkansas.

Chicken barn owner, Clyde Smitherton, reported four hundred dead chickens and over five thousand dollars worth of damage to his state-the-art pens and feeding equipment. Clyde said officials from the zoo refused to speak with him.

I contacted the zoo director, Myrtle Tittlebottom, this morning.

~ Phone conversation with Myrtle ~

Jodie: Good morning, Mrs. Tittlebottom.

Myrtle: If this is a reporter, I'm hanging up.

Jodie: Mrs. Tittlebottom, my readers want to know if Hitchcock zoo is going to compensate Clyde for his dead chickens, damage to his property, and lost revenue.

Myrtle: None of your business.

Jodie: What about all the livestock the werewolves killed this week? There have been reports of mutilated and dead carcasses across northeastern Arkansas.

Myrtle: Stupid %$#^ A$$ reporters!

:phone slams down in my ear: