Showing posts with label theft. Show all posts
Showing posts with label theft. Show all posts

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Stolen Sasquatch Recovered! part II

Continued

Norman, the Sasquatch aka Big Foot, has been captured near the small town of Stigler, Oklahoma (in the mundane world.)

Master Healer Margaret Mai Lynn officially reported no serious injuries, stating she stabilized a broken leg. I found out later, she broke Sídhí law by completely healing a ruptured artery in the mundane rancher when he tried calling for help. If she hadn't healed him, he would've died.

For all you mundanes out there, be very wary of healers. Never, not unless you are seconds from dying, ask a healer to help you. Trust me you'll probably end up dead. When it comes to a mundane, a healer is more dangerous than a dhark vampire.

You see, healers can heal Sídhí.

Vampire, dragon, shapeshifter, it doesn't matter which Sídhí race as long as a person has synth crystal in their blood a healer can pull energy from herself and the injured person. This allows the healer enough energy to heal a Sídhí, even if the Sídhí is near death.

Unfortunately, when a healer attempts to heal a mundane the person's very life essence is sucked out. Sucking a person's essence is very addictive. That's why most valleys have banned healers from visiting Earth, a ruthless practice, but effective.

On a happy note, the mundane rancher is alive. He fell into a coma due to his life's essence nearly getting sucked dry, but Healer Margaret swears he'll wake-up in a month or two.

Oh dear! I've gone off on one of my tangents, haven't I? On to the events of Friday night, which lead to Norman's capture!

I parked my ancient Chevy truck next to the brick ranch house in the nick of time.

Clan Guardian Alexander stood on the porch, berating Healer Serena for nearly killing Mark. Several Clan Guardians noticed me and waved, but I steered clear of Alexander. He would've stopped me from interviewing the victims.

I found Mark's wife and three teenage girls sitting in the living room. Each of them stared blankly at the ceiling, mouths dropped open.

I feared the guardians had already wiped the true memories from their minds and mentally ordered them to remain silent. Thankfully, that didn't happen.

Guardian Tremaine, a really sweet vampire with dark auburn hair and a gorgeous – repeat all rippling muscles, no fat – body, allowed me to interview the women.

The youngest daughter, Sheila, provided the best recount of the evening. The mother wouldn't quit sobbing and the other two girls couldn't take their eyes off Tremaine to answer my questions.

Anyway, Sheila said they heard a horrible noise about ten o'clock.

Mark grabbed his gun, ordering his wife to lock the door behind him. He opened the front door. Shouted (Sheila said, he sounded scared) and rapidly fired his gun. Slammed the door shut. All the while, shouting for everyone to run to the cellar. That's what they call storm shelters.

They ran through the house toward the kitchen. Sheila heard the front door, a solid oak monstrosity, being ripped off its hinges.

Attached to the house, the storm shelter opened into the laundry room. They piled in the cement room and bolted the steel door shut.

Mark was a smart man. Well, mostly. On their dash through the kitchen, he kicked the trash can over, spilling its contents. They had spent the night before cutting and packing a deer he shot. Yes, he killed it out of season, but that's beside the point.

The blood kept the Sasquatch occupied.

If Mark had stayed in the storm shelter, everything would've worked out fine. He didn't. He left to call for help and the Sasquatch chased him up a tree.

Unfortunately, all Sasquatch have very long claws and are very good tree climbers.

Norman slashed Mark's thigh, puncturing a major artery.

Clan guardians showed up before Norman pulled Mark out of the tree, shooting Norman with a tranquilizer dart.

Norman is now peacefully sleeping off the tranq dart. For those of you who wish to meet Norman, his new home is a twenty acre enclosure at Mordecai's Sasquatch Ranch.

Mordecai's has daily tours. I encourage families or individuals who want a longer adventure to purchase one of their many tour packages, which (depending on the package you pick) include a cabin, jet skis, trail rides, and a dozen other wonderful extras. Tell them Jodie sent you!

On a final note, Clan guardians gave the mundane family and Haskell County emergency workers vague memories of a rabid black bear, not a very good cover story but it worked.

Until next time ~ Jodie B. Cooper

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Stolen Sasquatch Recovered!

Stigler, Oklahoma: Earth

Miss Clara Burnstien, who has lived in the mundane world for the last one hundred and twenty-three years, faithfully listens to the local police scanner. Last night, at 11:15, an unusual report sent Haskell County deputies to Mark Hawk's ranch.

Clan guardians confiscated the recorded message from Haskell County, but I managed to get a copy.

Operator: Haskell County...

Mark: You've got to help us!

Operator: Is this an emergency?

Mark: Yes! A monster broke into the house!

Operator: Please, stay calm. Is the assailant still there?

Mark: It's not a person!

:A high shrieking scream with dual tones erupts in the background:

Operator: Oh my God! What was that?

Mark: The monster! Big Foot!

:pause:

Mark: We need help! I shot the damn thing with a 9mm. I hit it three times and didn't kill it!

Operator: Tying up this phone line with a half-cocked prank...

Mark: Hell and damnation! My family is gonna die cause you won't get off your high horse and send me help! You want a good enough reason to send a deputy? Fine! I'm gonna kill my wife and three kids!

Operator: You're nuts! I'll send a car and I'll testify at your trial, you crazy S.O.B.

:Phone slams down:

Well, that was interesting. I can't say I blame the poor operator, Mark did sound deranged.

…continued until tomorrow.

Jodie B. Cooper




Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Sasquatch Theft & Dragon Guardian Interview

Clan Valley guardians are investigating the disappearance of a sasquatch (aka Big Foot) from Mordecai's Sasquatch Ranch on the western edge of Lake Eufaula in the Eastern part of Oklahoma.

Clan guardians believe there is foul play involved, but the owner of the ranch is not a subject in the ongoing investigation. The animal arrived the same day it disappeared and hadn't been paid for. Mordecai Bunn said his insurance wouldn't cover the disappearance of the animal.

As a side note, I wanted to mention I've visited the ranch, which has cabins and jet skis for rent. The ranch is a fun family destination. It's also world famous for it sasquatch breeding program, which provides zoos and big game hunters with quality Sasquatch.

Onward to the promised interview with a Dragon Guardian!

I transcribed the promised conversation I had with dragon guardian Alexander concerning the terrorist organization Khr'Vurr, which is based in Dragon Valley.

I'll skip the pleasantries and get to the good stuff...

Jodie: Is it true the Khr'Vurr, a notoriously 'dragon only' organization is actively recruiting outside of Dragon Valley?

Alexander: No comment.

Jodie: You're a guardian. It's your duty to protect. So shouldn't you be willing to warn people? What if they start terrorizing the other valleys? People need information.

Alexander: Jodie, this isn't a game. You need to keep your nose out of it.

Jodie: Yes, I know it isn't a game. That's my point! Wouldn't it be better to warn people?

Alexander: :sighs: We believe the Khr'Vurr is actively seeking new recruits.

Jodie: Are they targeting any specific valley? You know like only valleys in the Dhark Empire?

Alexander: Off the record?

Jodie: Yes, of course! (he knew I'd tell... I always do.)

Alexander: The Khr'Vurr have united with several Dhark Valley Lords, extending their network into a dozen different valleys. This is a very dangerous time for Sídhí and Mundanes. We're concerned the silent war they've started may soon explode into something a lot worse.

Jodie: You mean like the bomb exploding in the Royal Valley? I've heard it was targeting Prince Jacoby, because he refused to cooperate with the Khr'Vurr.

:pause:  Then he hissed at me!

Alexander: Who told you that?

Jodie: Anonymous tip. I've been going through records. Did you know in the last three months car bombs and kidnappings have increased by four hundred percent?

:low, deep growl:  Dragons, even when they are in human form, growl really well. He made the hair stand up on my head.

Jodie: And I've heard the Dragon Council is so desperate to find the Khr'Vurr ring leaders they have threatened other valleys.

:silence:

Jodie: Well, is it true? Can Dragon Council shut down all the gateways leading to Earth? Will they?

Alexander: Jodie, you get one warning. This is it. Stay out of Khr'Vurr business. And more importantly stay out of council business. Do not go spreading false rumors.

Jodie: Now, wait a minute...

Alexander: No, you're sticking your nose into things that's going to get you killed. The Khr'Vurr are big league. Stay. Out. Of. It.

Jodie: I'm a reporter. It's my duty...

:he cuts me off, the nerve!:

Alexander: No, you're a nosy busy body.

:Slams phone down in my ear:

Well! That was rude!

Honestly, anyone who knows me understands my need for searching out the true story. No matter the danger to my own well being. Of course, someone like Alexander calls it nosy behavior, but I think everyone understands my need to give them the true story.

Never worry, I'll keep digging!